I was just cleaning up in the kitchen this morning when Charlie came in. He was pointing at the oven and saying something over and over. I figured he remembered my making peanut butter cookies a couple days ago (which we had long since eaten) and thought more would come out of the oven. So I said, “No cookies! It’s empty, see?” and opened the door. To my suprise, there was a pan of overdone cookies inside! He must have been able to see them. Anyway, that was really weird. Further proof that I am, in fact, losing my mind! The good news is they are still edible. Not the best batch, but … hey, they are cookies.

Ok. I get it. I think I have finally exhausted myself to complete brokeness by obsessing over every detail of our kitchen remodel/addition. I finally get it. If it’s meant to happen, it will happen. I need to let God take care of all the details and just stop worrying about it. Total surrender. I feel like I have said this before, maybe a “fake it until you make it kind of thing.” But something totally clicked yesterday and I feel this burden lifted off my shoulders. Why would I try to carry something like this by myself? Nothing up to this point has worked out in our favor, or so it seems. And I am so frustrated because it seemed so “unfair.” But, what’s fair? We don’t deserve anything. We have no right to anything. If you are a Christian, you and all you have, including your “rights,” belong to God.

I haven’t been blogging about the house much lately because I didn’t want it to come across as whining. I knew it then and I know it now: it’s meaningless! It’s a house. We have a place to call home. We have all that we need to function as a family. Don’t waste your life whining and wishing! Focus on God’s will and purpose and promises for your life instead … And worship! There are more important things to contend with when you look at life through a spiritual lens. Life is too short not to.

“What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God.” James 4:1-7

“The earth is the LORD’s, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it.” Psalm 24:1

For more Wordless Wednesday entries: WordlessWednesday.com and 5 Minutes for Mom.

My favorite vacation has to be spring break 2002. My husband and I had just moved into our first house and we decided to tag along with some friends who invited us on their road trip to Destin, FL. I remember they asked so flippantly. “Wanna go?” And I wonder sometimes if we surprised them with our positive response. We drove through the night and met another couple there, whose younger brother we actually stayed with. The first evening, we celebrated his 21st birthday by watching the sunset on the beach and go-karting. We spent an entire day on a boat in the gulf and the water was beautiful (but cold)! Matt even caught a fish. My favorite part was seeing some dolphins who were playing in our wake and swimming around the boat. We also spent some time at Club La Vela, with college kids on spring break all around us–not our favorite part as it made us feel old (and this was before kids)!

Other favorite vacations include a trip to Las Vegas (two Cirque de Soleil shows with press passes! and a bus ride to Hoover Dam) and Seattle to visit a college friend. While in Seattle, we took a 3-hour boat ride to the San Juan Islands for a day, where we biked and watched for orcas. We also camped one night on the beach near the Pacific shorline and in Olympic National park. And, of course, we saw the Space Needle, the Pikes Place Public Market and the Seattle Mariners vs. Chicago White Sox baseball game.

Thanks to Alison @ RDH Mom hosting this week’s Fun Monday!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e4zgJXPpI4

“For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.”
Colossians 1:16-17

For more Wordless Wednesday entries: WordlessWednesday.com and 5 Mintues for Mom.

I am a trusting person. So much so that I get teased by my friends because it leads to some poor decisions. I like that I am trusting though. I know that it stems, ultimately, from my trust in God and His promise to care for me. But I have noticed a discord in that characteristic recently. When it comes to money, I don’t trust anyone but me (and my husband).

I am having a hard time giving up control to a general contractor for our remodeling project. I don’t trust that they have our best interest in mind or that they won’t help us try to find ways to keep costs down. And, ultimately, I am not trusting God that He has our best interest in mind and that He will provide what we need (again, it just may not be what I think we need).

Instead, I lay awake at night with a pit in my stomach, going through every line item to find ways to save money, and trying to get 2 + 2 to equal 3 so we can afford everything we (well, I) want.

Thankfully, I see the error of my ways and am asking for God’s help in taking this burden from me:

“Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” Mark 9:24

A day at the park! Charlie was having a great time going down the slide and copying his big sister. Once in a while he managed his own version of “Look at me!” Isn’t he studly in those shades? About those … they are Cars sunglasses, featuring, uh … Sally! Oops. I didn’t realize until we got them home. Anyway, they are no longer. Charlie broke them the other day, stretching them past their limit. Glad I got a few pics of him wearing ‘em because he was so excited. I’ll have to get him another pair; maybe I’ll get boys’ ones this time!

For more Wordless Wednesday entries: WordlessWednesday.com and 5 Minutes for Mom.

Not sure what I think about this: Huntley preschool has Messiah on the move.

I’m just not sold on the idea of embodying Jesus in a doll. Does it give children the wrong idea of who or what Jesus is? I love the idea of sending a doll around the country though, it’s a great way for the kids to learn. I also know Jesus’ omnipresence is a hard concept to grasp so I understand the need to try to put Him in a box. But, that will be all the harder to “undo” as the children get older. Beth Moore once said in her Believing God Bible study, “If you send your children to [a Christian] school to learn a little something about God, they might learn that God is a little something.” My point is, no matter where your children are being educated, be sure you are involved so that you can be involved in their education and their spiritual growth.

Our Bible study discussion was derailed the past couple weeks as we discussed a tangent on idols. Even as Christians we tend to make idols of seemingly good things, such as Jesus dolls, the Bible or becoming like Christ. We have this tendency because our human nature wants to be in control. We obsess about, “what can I do?” and end up in a self-help mentality instead of focusing on Jesus has already done for us. If we rely on our knowledge, our action, ourselves, we lose the necessity of Christ in our lives. Our goal instead should be simply to know God and let him do the rest. Strive to be yourself, who God created you to be, in Christ Jesus.

To continue with the thoughts on contentment in my previous post …

No matter what it is that we want, as soon as we get it, we want something else. I knew this was going to happen but I didn’t realize it would take place so quickly. We haven’t even started demolition on the kitchen yet, but in my mind I’ve already moved on to other projects. The kitchen now is the least of my concerns. It has to get done; it’s going to get done. There is other work that I keep trying to lump into this project because suddenly it NEEDS to be done … NOW. The kitchen is not enough anymore. As we’ve discussed other plans, I’ve become excited about the potential extra space and comfort, including an upstairs addition–a third bedroom for us so the kids don’t have to share anymore (a legitimate request but not a neccesity yet), remodeled porch (well, it IS rotting) and a breezeway for the front entrance (so we don’t have to worry about hitting the dining room chairs when we open the door). Of course, nothing comes cheap. It has become a problem because my husband keeps injecting this reality into my fantasy! Did I mention we haven’t even started yet?

McDonald writes in Lord, Change My Attitude: Before Its Too Late: “When desires for something are controlling you, you lose your capacity to discern sufficiency.” The more you get, the more you want. Before we had begun the process of remodeling the kitchen, I hadn’t once thought that we needed a breezeway (I thought only of a new kitchen and how wonderful life would be!). Now, I know I’m going to be disappointed, a little or a lot I am not sure, when I don’t get one. I’m not saying the desires I have are bad or sinful, but my attitude can be. What am I living for? In the end, I know I want what’s best for our family. I can trust that God does, too. So, I simply need to rely on Him for what we need and let Him be in control of what’s sufficient for us. It may not be the same as my plan. But it will be the best plan for me and my family. That will always be enough.

“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Philippians 4:12

We were leaving after a play date with good friends this morning and my friend’s son wanted to come home with us. My daughter asked, “Why?”

Avery: Because I have a lot of toys?
Mom: No, because you are his friend and he likes to spend time with you.
Avery: But I do have a lot of toys.
Mom: Yes, and toys are fun. But they are not what makes you special.

As I said it, I knew I needed to hear it, too. Sometimes we forget we are not defined by our stuff! 

I’m reading James MacDonald’s Lord, Change My Attitude: Before Its Too Late, specifically two chapters on covetousness and contenment. As he writes, “we are far more infected with materialism than we realize, and some of the worst victims are the ones who think they are living in victory.” Whether you want the wrong things, the right things at the wrong time or in the wrong amounts or for the wrong reasons, it’s all covetousness. It has a strong hold on all of us. When you covet something and dwell on it, you make it more attractive and accessible than it really is, simply because you want it. Do you want it more than God’s blessing? The Israelites wandering in the desert asked for meat instead of the provision of manna. They got what they wanted but God withdrew Himself. Is it possible that covetousness–even when the desire fulfilled–has actually gotten in the way of your pursuit for greater joy and blessing in your life?


Psalm 106:15 “He gave them their request, but sent leanness to their soul.”