I am sure you’ve heard someone in your life say this to you or maybe you’ve said it yourself: “Let go, and let God.” I know I have. But I struggle with what that really means. What level of action is too little or too much to affect needed change or even a life blessing? A friend was telling me about how God revealed an answer to him recently, after wrestling with its meaning for years. He described it as a three step process:

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34

Do you pray big enough? Do you pray small enough? I know I don’t. Even though sometimes I know that God can do something, no matter how big or small, it doesn’t mean that He will, so I often pray so that I won’t be disappointed in the outcome. And a lot of times I only pray when it’s something big because it doesn’t seem important enough for God to deal with. It’s with the little stuff that I seem to struggle with big faith. Like Martha in John’s account of Lazarus’ resurrection, speaking to Jesus, “I know that God will give [Jesus] whatever [He] ask.” But, then, at the tomb, Jesus is about to commence the biggest, most controversial miracle yet (raising a man from the dead after four days) and Martha is worried about the odor of Lazarus’ body! We need to give that up to Him as well. We’re called to recognize God’s wisdom and methods in all the details.

“Then Jesus said, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?’ ” John 11:40

I was so blessed today with some kind words spoken about my daughter by her teacher. Today was the last day of PDO, the one-day preschool I had Avery enrolled in for the year. There was a program this morning, featuring each of the three classes where they sang a few songs and parents were got an overview of what the kids learned this year. The best, I think, was the 3-4 year old class reciting the pledge of allegiance. They were so cute! At the end of each class’ songs, the teachers said a few words about each student. I wasn’t impressed with most of what they had to say (but, of course, they aren’t my kids!) although a few shared interesting anecdotes or conversations with the student. But Avery’s teacher, Ms Thea, got choked up when it came to her turn. I was touched to hear her say: “Avery is a good listener and a helper … Now, Avery is a little on the shy side (and I hope I don’t get choked up but I already am) but when it comes to talking with God, she speaks! Avery is not shy to talk to God her Father. When it’s snack time or lunch time, she will pray. She may not say a word the rest of the day, but she will pray. She has such a heart for God. And that is so encouraging to us.” It was God’s timing because I was already fuming and rolling my eyes at Avery’s “performance” during the song and q&a. She didn’t say one word or even do a single hand motion (except at one point when the kids held hands and swayed them back and forth, the boys next to her were holding her hand and she couldn’t get out of it, lol). I was hoping she had grown since her AWANA stage fright from last year. (The good news is I took some more entertaining photos of her for future embarrassment.) But Ms Thea gave me a gentle reminder that while performing on stage might not be her thing, Avery has a tender heart. Knowing the answers in her heart will trump shouting them out on stage any day.

If you have a complaining spirit–you know who I am you are!–and find yourself whining and wishing or obsessing about one desire after another, YOU NEED TO READ NUMBERS 11 and 12. What a rich lesson that I’ve always just skimmed over in the past. In this part of Moses’ story, the Israelites, who have been saved from slavery remember, are complaining, not because they have NEED of anything, but because they are bored. Bored with the manna that God has provided them in the desert so they do not starve. Not only does their complaining spirit reveal a lack of faith in the circumstances God has put you in and an ungratefulness for what God has provided, but it is a form of rejecting God! In verse 20 of Numbers 11 God says the people have “rejected the LORD.” What is their punishment? They get what they ask for! Meat, more meat than they can stand. And it was to their own demise, for the meat carried a plague that killed every last one of those who desired it. Be careful what you pray for. Instead of attempting to satisfy unhealthy cravings, pray that you would desire what God wants for your life so that you don’t miss out on his wonderful blessings, like the promised land.

“The LORD heard you when you wailed, ‘If only we had meat to eat! We were better off in Egypt!’ Now the LORD will give you meat, and you will eat it. You will not eat it for just one day, or two days, or five, ten or twenty days, but for a whole month—until it comes out of your nostrils and you loathe it—because you have rejected the LORD, who is among you.” Numbers 11:18-20

Dear Lord,

In Jesus’ Name,
AMEN

I read Psalm 13 this morning and it struck me as a verse of encouragement and prayer for anyone feeling depression or frustration over prevailing “failure:”

Psalm 13

How long, O LORD? Will You forget me forever?
How long will You hide Your face from me?

How long shall I take counsel in my soul,
Having sorrow in my heart daily?
How long will my enemy be exalted over me?

Look on me and answer, O LORD my God;
Give light to my eyes,
or I will sleep in death;
Lest my enemy say,
“I have prevailed against him”;
Lest those who trouble me rejoice when I fail.

But I have trusted in Your mercy;
My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.
I will sing to the LORD
For He has been good to me.

I was moved by the following entry in Jesus Calling, Sarah Young’s daily devotional, written from the perspective of Jesus talking to us, so I am sharing part of it with you:

I don’t believe in “wishes” so I’ve never quite known what to do about wishing wells. For a while, I decided just to ignore them. But then I noticed that many fountains donate the money thrown in as wishes to worthy organizations. So, I started to feel bad about my “boycott.“

Today, I was at the mall with my kids. Avery loves the fountain, so we went to see it before we left … And she asked to throw money in. Those fountains full of coins are interesting to toddlers and preschoolers so I knew it might come up some day. We’ve never talked about it or done anything with the money before. So, here’s what I did. I showed her the sign posted about where the money was being donated, and I read it to her. Then I told her what we were going to do: pray. So, I had her repeat after me:

“Dear Lord,
I pray for the person who receives this quarter. Please bless them with the donation from this fountain, and use it to show your glory. Amen.” Then, she threw in the coin (I would have liked to have used a penny as cheap as I am but a quarter was all I had!). She was so excited, and it was so simple. Such a small change in a usually routine thing (I don’t know many people who “boycott” wishing wells!) that can make a huge impact on my kids spiritually. She remembered at supper, with prompting, that she threw in the coin and that we prayed when we gave daddy an account of our trip.

I thought I was having a decent week as far as managing my anger. I was feeling good and feeling like I was on the right track. But the past two days I have been failing, and I know why. I have been internalizing my anger instead of venting it–my usual reaction. I went from one extreme to the other, and both reactions are sinful. And I am relying on myself instead of on God. I’m still trying to figure out what that means, to truly let God be in control.

I am struggling with quiet time this week, too. I am praying throughout the day, but I just can’t seem to sit down and devote time to God through prayer and Bible study. Without putting him first, I am finding I don’t have the strength to do even what I know He wants me to do. I am not able to release the energy in a constructive way so that I can address the problem while strengthening my relationhsip with those around me, and with God.

Ugh. I am so frustrated. I feel like I have all the pieces to a puzzle, but I can’t get them in the right order so that the picture makes sense! Or like I am trying to put it together blindfolded so I don’t even know when I do have something right.

I have asked God to take this burden from me, to release me from the bondage of this sin. I know that he can but realized that He won’t. My passion is part of who makes me who God wants me to be. Instead, I need His help, His strength, His patience, His endurance to work through this growing pain so that He can be glorified.

Lord, I cannot overcome on my own. Help me to use self-control to hold back rather than hold in or vent my anger. I want to learn how to release my anger under control by the help of your Spirit. Enable me to exercise patience while lifting others up so that you may be glorified, and use my passionate energy for your honor.

“With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26

In our house, I am the dishwasher. I love the look I get from other women when they find out that I have two kids and no machine to do this duty for me. Washing dishes is my most hated chore—always has been actually. It’s time-consuming and gross, and I always, always get wet. And it’s a never-ending task! There are days I don’t think I can bear to wash another dish.

When my husband had the house to himself for four days, he had used two bowls, a plate and a couple spoons and knives. No problem. But after one day of me and the kids, there are four-plus bowls, six or more plates, at least two glasses (I try to drink water all day but keep misplacing the glass), plus a kid cup or two, and nearly a dozen eating utensils. And that’s before I make dinner! Now, I shouldn’t complain. I know I am not the only one in the world who doesn’t have a dishwasher. They are a modern convenience. But I will be so extremely thankful when I can say (one part of) my job has been replaced by technology.

Until then, here are a few tips for making the best of it. One, wash dishes right after dinner. The best way to start the day is not with Folgers (I don’t drink coffee), but walking into a clean, uncluttered kitchen! I have a difficult time with this one, however, because I want to relax. I’ve been working all day, after all. Sometimes this is family time, too. But, by doing the dishes I can get a break from the kids while my husband plays with them. This doesn’t always work since Avery likes to help—thus guaranteeing I get even wetter than usual.

Which brings me to my second tip: have the kids join you. I know kids aren’t always the most helpful when it comes to chores, but it is a great bonding time and, I hope, it will help them learn to understand that contributing to the household is part of being a family. Now that Avery is 3 1/2, she actually can be helpful. Her jobs include putting away the silverware (sans sharp knives of course) and rinsing the soap bubbles off dishes I’ve washed.

The third tip is, if you find yourself washing dishes, by yourself, in the peace and quiet of the kitchen while your kids are occupied somewhere else, use that time to pray and meditate. I know we moms are busy, and sometimes we think we are too busy to spend time with God. In her book, “The Busy Mom’s Guide to Prayer,” Lisa Welchel (yes, Blair from Facts of Life) offers this and many more tips to continuously connecting with our Father, rather than packaging it up into one or two prayer sessions at the beginning or end of a day. Use everyday tasks and objects as inspiration. While doing the dishes, for example, pray Psalm 51:2: “Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.” You can even hang an index card with the  verse (or other verses you want to instill in your heart) above the sink as a reminder to focus on God during this “down time.” I think I’ll go do that right now.

“Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.” Psalm 51:2

See also Oh, and another thing …